Kids for Guns
Criminal Name: Tanya Nareau
Location: Mesa, Arizona
The Story: Like some parents, Tanya Nareau was not entirely pleased with her two-year old daughter. She also needed a gun. Demonstrating a true "can do" attitude that sets criminals apart from us regular folks, Nareau decided to kill two birds with one stone and SOLD her child FOR A GUN.
The Moral: If you are intent on purchasing a weapon, do so with cash, not your offspring.
Facebook Addict
Criminal Name: Jonathan Parker
Location: Martinsburg, Pennsylvania
The Story: Jonathan Parker had a serious problem; he was addicted to facebook. Perhaps more serious, he was addicted to checking facebook while robbing houses. After breaking into a home in Martinsburg, Pennsylvania and stealing two diamonds worth $3,500, Parker logged into facebook to check what his criminal friends were up to, or perhaps to change his status to "totally robbing a house, lol". While there is nothing wrong with doing this, he forgot to log out of his account when he left and consequently the next time someone used the computer, they saw all of Jonathan Parker's information and apprehended him shortly thereafter.
The Moral: If you must check facebook at the scene of the crime, remember to log out after the fact.
Solar Crack
Criminal Name: Christopher Bess
Location: Chico, California
The Story: Chris Bess was a 32-year-old drug addict with an unusual plan to sate his addiction; he had noticed that the nearby school had solar panels worth $50,000 on the roof. Naturally, as any enterprising addict would do, he stole them. We have no idea where you could fence stolen solar panels, but Bess clearly has connections that we do not. It wasn't until he was jailed for drug possession that the truth came out during a phonecall that he placed while still inside the jail wherein he told an associate to get rid of the remaining solar panels. It didn't take long for federal authorities to realize that the solar panels being discussed were the same ones missing from the school and the consequences followed.
The Moral: When on the phone in prison, don't tell people to sell your stolen swag, especially not a school's stolen solar swag.
